It's not so good! but it's for vega, maybe takes up 2min of your time! love alkth
Ok, but I'm bored at work now :(
Hahahahahah
and glad to see you finally accepted my name for you, Vincent Vega Table :P
Yes, they're ;-)
Admit that they were funny!
Vega, please :P
Fun jokes and should be worth spending time reading. Sort of what the log is about, eh? SO I'M NOT OFF TOPIC!
A group of girlfriends went on vacation and they see a five-story hotel with a sign that reads 'For Women Only'. Since they were without their
boyfriends, they decide to go in. The Doorman, a very attractive guy,
explains to them how it works...'We have 5 floors...go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there.' 'It's
easy to decide, since each floor has signs telling you what's inside.' So they start going up, and on the first floor the sign reads: 'All the men here are horrible lovers, but they are sensitive and kind'... the friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor. The sign on the Second floor reads 'All the men here are wonderful lovers, but they generally
treat women badly'. This wasn't going to do. So the friends move up to the Third floor where the sign read 'All the men here are great
lovers and sensitive to the needs of women. 'This was good but there were still two more floors, so, on to the Fourth floor, the sign was perfect.
'All the men here have perfect builds; are sensitive and attentive to women; are perfect lovers; they are also single, rich and straight'
The women seemed pleased but they decide that they would rather see what the fifth floor has to offer before they settle for the fourth. When they reach the Fifth floor, there is only a sign that reads: 'There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman.'
One night a guy takes his girlfriend home. They are about to kiss each other goodnight, but the guy is feeling a little horny. With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and, smiling, he says to her ?Darling, would you give me a blow job?'
Horrified, she replies 'Are you mad? My parents will see us!'
Him: 'Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?'
Her: 'No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?'
Him: 'Oh come on, there's nobody around, they're all sleeping!'
Her: 'No way. It's just too risky!'
Him (horny as hell): 'Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?'
Her: 'No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!'
Him: 'Oh yes you can. Please?'
Her: 'No, no. I just can't'
Him: 'I beg you ... '
Out of the blue, the light on the stairs goes on, and the girl's sister shows up in her pyjamas, hair disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she says: 'Dad says to go ahead and give him a blow job. Or I can do it. Or if need be, he'll come down himself and do it. But for god sake tell him to take his hand off the intercom...'
it's my name
but in which way? roasted or boiled?
ok I admit it, I stole the wager my donkey from
'
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.
After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, 'When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.' So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note on the door:
1. Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the Spook.
8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.
9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.
10. We do not refer to the cross as the 'Big T'
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, 'Take this and eat it for it is my body.' He did not say 'Eat me.'
12. The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, yeah God.
13. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St.Peter's, not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
'
Quick poll: Which is better, vega table or vegatable?
I'll wager my donkey you have some more logs for me alkth :^(
love vega table
*Bash.org's you IN TEH FACE!*
Ok, random bash.org quotes it is, then.
love vegatable
I was out for pizza and a smoke, but hmm, please post more logs!
teh own log
yay